Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
