yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
