well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize
