he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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