There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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