I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
