dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I understand Curling. That high.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
