I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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