I cockslap morals
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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