smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
