wat bout pragnant strippers??
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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