hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
