Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize