Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
