member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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