just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Dick very happy bro
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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