It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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