what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I currently don't understand fingers.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize