Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
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