having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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