If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
