Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
