Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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