Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
So many bounce houses so little time
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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