I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize