is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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