So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
