After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I understand Curling. That high.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
