We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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