I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
