I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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