I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
