have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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