i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Terrible idea I love it
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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