hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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