you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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