your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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