I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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