the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
