it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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