On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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