As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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