Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize