I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
