So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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