I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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