Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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