and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm at about main and main street
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
false alarm, still single
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