I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
