just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize